My mom sat me down to talk today about what to do once she dies. She doesn't want to be cremated. She also told me that before she dies she is going to get very sick. Probably so sick that she doesn't want me to see her. So she says she is going to go live in Smyrna with my aunt so she can take care of her till she goes.
I'm not ready for this. I am 20 years old I am not ready to lose her. I don't want to do this. I can't do this I am not strong enough to do this. I have been breaking down ever since she talked to me about it. I AM NOT READY !!!
It's not fair.
I can't do this.
Please God...Someone...help me.
I am losing it.
Brittany<3
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Oh God honey i am in tears with you! I know exactly how you feel and what you mean. It breaks my heart that you are facing this and that your Mom is facing this! I just wish i could hold you and tell you that it will all be ok.
It wont be ok for a long time but eventually it will be ok. My mom has been gone for 8 years now and not a day goes by where i dont want her here or wish she could sit with me just one more time.
I know you worry a lot about Kaci not knowing her but she will. She will know her through you and she will know because you will tell her everyday how great her Grandma was!
Losing a loved on is never easy and you have so much on your plate. Please know i am always here if you want to talk. Email me some time and i will give you my home number so if you ever need to talk to someone who has been there you will have me.
I know your pain and i am so so sorry!
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