Hello living person inside me.

Yea so its dawning on me for real now I will be a mother in ...6 months. It hadn't dawned on me before 2 night ago I had to go to the ER because I started bleeding. Well we had an ultrasound and when the ultrasound first started my baby was laying there. I saw no heartbeat and it wasn't moving. Needless to say I started panicking. Then...it happened. I think I coughed or sneezed maybe and it shook my belly a little and I saw those little arms and legs start hitting me. Tears flooded my eyes. Not only did it actually have arms and legs this time but it had a face and looked just like a baby. Not a little sea monkey like previous ultrasounds. My little acrobat was turning backflips and sucking its little thumb. And is also measuring about 12 days further than we thought. So new due date is May 7th !!!! I saw that heart just racing at 168 bpm and its little fingers and toes opening and closing. I was in love at that moment. Its like before that I didnt really feel like a mother I never felt that instant love that everyone had talked about and I swear at that moment I fell so in love with this little person growing inside me I moved the ultrasound tech to tears at almost 3 in the morning haha. She was so moved she let us just sit there and watch my baby for an hour !!! My mom of course was with me because Brandon is still out of town and she was in tears the entire time. I forgot at that moment about the sickness and ache and pains and tiredness and heartburn and all the icky things that are happening lately. All I could think about at that moment was about my little one. My little baby that I am growing. Its a strange feeling at first. Feeling like you are becoming a mother. Even writing this I am feeling the tears hitting my belly.

To my little one,
No matter how sick to my stomach I am. No matter how tired I am. No matter the terrible things that come along with pregnancy. I know now how worth it you really are. I love you. And I can only imagine how much love I'll have for you when you come out if I love you this much already. It overwhelms me all the time just to think that someone is going to call me mommy this time next year. You are worth every single time I throw up in this pregnancy and you know how much mommy hates throwing up. I swear I would throw up everyday till you were born if that meant I get you at the end of it all. Nothing else matters now. Just you and daddy and God. As long as I have you all...nothing can bring me down. Thank you for choosing me. I don't know what I did to deserve something so wonderful. You are and always will be my precious gift from God.
Love,
Mommy