Dear Kaci

13 Months...already. I still don't know where time is going. In the last few days you have went from crawling around to pulling yourself up onto things and walking holding on...I feel like you will try walking on your own very soon. You will walk holding both or one of my hands and you laugh the whole time cause you like the way your shoes squeak. Mommy bought you a pair of squeaker sneakers and they are just way to cute. I can't believe how big you have gotten Kaci. You are starting to not be my baby anymore but turning into my toddler. It's crazy to say that but you are not my itty bitty 7 lb baby I gave birth to. If only I could go back and snuggle with you a few more times when you couldn't push me away so you could go play with your toys. At one time Kaci I was the funnest thing you ever played with...then you discovered toys and now you only snuggle me a few times a day. I miss the days I would do nothing but hold you in my arms and watch you sleep. Those moments are priceless. I can still picture your sweet little face when you were just a month old coming home from Vanderbilt I couldn't believe you were really home so the whole first week you were home I don't think I put you down but for a few minutes at a time...All I wanted to do was hold you and never let go. And I still wanna do that but I can't your just growing up on me already. You are in a big girl bed now and you are in your own room. That really made it seem real to me that you were growing up when you didn't need to sleep with mommy and daddy anymore. I will say we are all getting more sleep this way but I do miss just being able to reach over and put my arm around you and know you are right by my side where you belong. But, you can't stay my baby forever. Of course, when you are 40 you will still be my baby. I am sure that is how MiMi feels about me. MiMi is one of your favorite people lately as well you will follow her around the house and just say "MiMi...MIMI...MIIIIMIIIII!!!" Its so funny but oh so sweet how much you love her. Kaci, I can only hope and pray that MiMi lives long enough for you to remember her. She is sick...and getting sicker but I have a feeling God is going to see her through this and let her live long enough to see you grow into a big girl. She loves you so much my hunny.She cries when she talks about how much she loves you. I want you to know that even if something did happen to her...you had the most amazing MiMi in the whole world...she loves you more than life itself and I think she even might almost love you as much as mommy and daddy do. She would lay down her life for you happily and I want you to always carry her love with you whether she is here to share it with you or not because rest assured she is head over heels for you :). Well my darling I just wanted to write another letter for you. I hope that when you read this years from now you will know how much we all loved you just by reading my words. I love you my sweet little miracle.
Mommy