Dear Kaci 27 months

My love how you have grown. There are just no words to express how fast this last month has went by. You are so big now its crazy. And talking, talking, talking. I think thats all you do nowadays. And you speak so clearly its kind of crazy sometimes. You can count to 10 and say bits of the ABCs. You can say over 70 words and will repeat whatever I ask you to. Its just amazing that you aren't that little baby anymore you are a full blown toddler now...and oh how it breaks mommys heart. When you were just born I thought of how much fun it would be when you got this age. How we would play together and watch princess movies together and stay up late having our little girl time...well we do all those things and they are amazing...but I find myself just wanting to go back. I want those moments back when you would wake up late at night and I would give you your bottle and rock you back to sleep all the while singing your favorite songs. You still love those songs to this day. You just don't have any urge for me to rock you anymore. And my arms ache for you. I wish so badly you would give me one hour of cuddle time with you...just to wrap my arms around you and kiss you and rub your back and sing to you...I feel like I am losing my baby. Of course I am not really losing you...you just don't need me as much as you once did and I am fine with that it just stings a little. First you didn't want to sleep in the bed with me anymore, then it was you didn't want me to rock you anymore, then it was you didn't need me to feed you anymore...and so many other things that you now don't need me for anymore. It hurts this mommys heart to know that you are growing up before my eyes and there is nothing I can do to slow this time down. Every moment with you...is amazing Kaci. You are without a doubt the most wonderful and amazing child God could have ever blessed me with. I feel so lucky to be your mommy. Through all the health scares and the long nights trying to figure out the right things to help those health issues...it was all worth it for you. I would do anything for you Kaci. I want you to always know and remember that even when I am long gone...you are my world. You are my heart. You are my sweet little baby bunny. And always remember there is no me without you my love. You are the reason I breathe. And no matter how big you get no matter whether you are 2 or 20...you will always be mommys baby.