Dear Kaci...

It's been a few weeks. I feel like a bad mommy I have been so busy with the holidays and everything going on with you being sick time has gotten away from me. This past week has been a rollercoaster. One moment we are told you have pneumonia and swine flu then the next day I am informed that you have neither of those and you have a VERY BAD bladder infection. Thank God for Dr. Little he has been such a blessing since the moment you were born I could never ask for a better pediatrician. Then the other day you stopped taking a bottle then you wouldn't take you paci which was really when I knew something was up because you LOVE you paci. So I took you to vanderbilt and of course you have a BAD case of thrush due to the antibiotics for the bladder infection. Today you finally started taking your bottles again. I have done nothing but cry,pray, and cuddle with you. You have said "Mama" over 20 times the past few days and MiMi and Daddy heard you so I am not losing my mind haha. You don't know what it does to me. On one hand it makes me the happiest mommy in the world and on the other hand you say it mostly when your upset and want me and its heartbreaking to know I couldn't do much to help you. My sweet angel I have enjoyed the cuddle and snuggling time we have had the last few days but now that your feeling better you don't seem to want to snuggle anymore except when your sleepy. But, I am glad your feeling better and I will take the snuggling anytime I can get it. You make me so happy. I watched you sleep last night for hours I just couldn't sleep because I was so happy that you were reating peacefully for the first night in almost a week. I cried and smiled out of shear happiness all night. I love you my angel...know that always. I am gonna go snuggle up next to you and daddy.

Update.

I have the biggest idiots in the world for doctors at the hospital here in town. My child does not have pneumonia nor does she have swine flu. She has a bladder infection. I took her to her pediatrician this morning cause I just didn't feel right... I am beyond pissed right now. But here are some pictures of my child who "has pneumonia and swine flu" :)

It's been so crazy...

I have no clue where to even start this. I guess I should start last week when I awoke to my daughter trying to roll over...well her arm got caught underneath her so I helped her nad put her arm up for her and she started crying so I rolled her over myself and I realized she wasn't moving her arm. She wouldn't reach for anything and anytime I touched her arm she screamed. So automatically I said we gotta go to the hospital. We got there and they knew something was up as well so they took her back for XRAYS and while they were holding her arm down on the table to get good pictures something popped back into place and BAM she was better. She was reaching and clapping and waving and it was like nothing happened. They called it Nursemaids elbow and apparently my brother had this same thing when he was a baby so... yea. But that was nothing compared to yesterday. I woke up and Kaci was acting funny. The night before she wasn't to interested in drinking her bottle but she didn't have a fever so I just gave her some tylenol and et her go to sleep I assumed her teeth were hurting her and she was so restless all night so when she woke up I took her temp again and it was 102.3 so I called her doctor but things were going downhill fast she started shaking and trembling and it was terrible to see so I told mom to call an ambulance. Now, I was not overreacting something was happening and I am so thankful I called them. They got here and took her temp and it had jumped to 104.5 so we tried to give her tylenol and she started pukin she puked 2 good glassfuls. We got in the ambulance and I gave her some tylenol she got it down and her fever went down to 102.3 again then we got to the hospital and they triaged her and her fever was back up to 105.5 and she was just so ill and upset. Long story short after a catheter and IV fluids they said she had an upper respiratory infection and maybe the makings of the Swine Flu so they gave her Tamiflu and sent us home. She has been okay ever since I give her Motrin and Tylenol (that is safe) and it has kept her fever down. I am just emotionally drained at this point. I saw things yesterday that brought back awful memories of when she was rushed to Vanderbilt for emergency surgery. I just cried. I tried to stay strong but it was just not happening. Luckily all Kaci wanted to do was cuddle and not just with anyone but with ME ! I was happy to oblidge :) ! I have to run her to the doc so I will post an update later.

Wordless Wednesday...